Have you ever?

Or never have I ever?
Or never will I ever?
Or never will I have that ever again?


Being in a relationship is a really really beautiful and weird thing.
Or complicated, that's a better word.
I feel that no matter how perfect you think the person you're with is, no matter how much you have in common...something is always missing, or lacking.
THAT or it's only missing or lacking because you're constantly comparing them to someone else, or holding them up to a certain standard.
Rather than just loving every single little thing about them and only them.



Have you ever had someone touch you in a way that it made you feel beautiful?
Have you ever had someone make it seem like licking your skin or stealing the air from your mouth was their only source of life?
Have you ever had someone rip your clothes off?
I was always hesitant on being fully naked because of how insecure I was about my body, and he made me be with him naked.
Sexually I was naked in every way.
The way he touched, the way he passionately kissed me hard, the way he pulled my hair and neck with force.
He allowed me to give all of myself to him sexually and he did the same.
He made it seem like he craved me, he tried to force himself in me in every single way.
He would go from making sweet gentle love to me, to hard passionate pain.
Nothing in this world has ever felt better than that.
Nothing in this world has ever made me feel more wanted than him.


All I've ever wanted he gave me, but that was just sexually and affectionately.
He lacked everything else, he was merely my literal pleasure.
The rest was all a headache, a wonder, a question, some tears.
Nothing about him was mine or belonged to me.
He lacked.




ugh I'll finish this one later...
my husband is coming home
:[